One of many definitions of intrusive thoughts linked to Obsessive Compulsive Disorder or OCD, according to Google:
“People with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder have intrusive thoughts (or images) that bother them. These can be thoughts about making mistakes, harming someone, contamination, disease, religious preoccupation, fears of impulses or desires, or just about anything that you might consider dangerous, disgusting or dirty.” – Google
As I have mentioned in a previous post, I have had struggles with OCD since the age of two, yes the age of two. Some behaviours I would grow out of an others would linger on with me as I aged, and some would develop as I aged, I over the years have struggled with various forms of OCD which would include:
Intrusive Thoughts including: Making Mistakes, Harming adults, children and infants, religious fears, health fears, etc. Those were at the given time the most deeming intrusive thoughts of mine to date. The worst intrusive thought state was the state when I thought I was harming children and infants, it killed me.
I started isolating myself from foster siblings, it got so bad and so consuming to a point where I could no longer eat or sleep. So an ambulance was called and my first official Psychiatric Ward stay at Vancouver General Hospital would begin. However, if it wasn’t for Dr. C. Taylor who saved my live repeatedly and if she had not started me on the best OCD medication known as Clomipramine, I would still be going in and out of VGH seeking relief, but now I stand Psychiatric Ward free for seven years now and on the same medications without many adjustments for five years now.
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder comes in all different types and forms, but it isn’t always about keeping your ducks in a row, it can affect some very deeply.